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From looking at the lighter side of low carbing, to special features just for your amusement, this page will allow
us a little freedom to share a laugh, take a poll, offer something... unexpected.
One Man Looks at his Wife's Love Of Chocolate:
I think I've pretty much decided that chocolate is God's way of reminding men how inadequate they are.
I am vividly confronted with this fact every time
my wife and I go out to a restaurant. When it gets to dessert, my wife usually orders the most chocolate-saturated
dessert possible: It's the one called "Unstoppable Double-Fudge Chocolate Mudslide Explosion" or some such thing. I
always wonder why anyone would want to eat anything that promises a catastrophic natural disaster in your mouth.
The dark brown monstrosity arrives at the table, and my wife takes the first bite. Before the fork is even removed
from her mouth, a small moan escapes her lips. Her eyes, previously perfectly aligned, first cross slightly and
then faze completely, pupils dilating in pure chocolate pleasure before the eyelids clamp down in ecstasy. The
hand not holding the fork clenches into a fist and starts pounding the table. The silverware rattles. After about six
minutes of this, she finally manages to swallow the bite, realign her eyes, and take the next shuttle back from whatever
transcendental plane she's been visiting. Slowly, her sphere of consciousness expands to include me, her husband, her
lifelong mate, her presumed partner in all things ecstatic. "Hey, this is pretty good," she'll say. "You want some?"
No, I don't. I want nothing to do with an object that does to my wife in one bite what I've worked for an entire
relationship to achieve. It wouldn't do any good, anyway. Men just don't have the same relationship with chocolate
that women do. It's not even close. I wandered around the office today and asked men — "Chocolate. Your thoughts?" — and
the result was always the same. First, a confused look as to why they're being asked about something so trivial, and
then some lame, obvious statement: "Ooh... it's uh... brown?"
Ask women the same question, and you get responses like "The ONLY food group!", "ESSENTIAL to life as we know it," and the
ultimate casual swipe at every member of the Y-chromosome brigade, "Better than sex!" Ouch.
Some women will try to make
up for that last one by quickly adding that chocolate is supposed to be an aphrodisiac. Uh-huh. Chocolate certainly
increases desire; problem is the desire is usually for more chocolate. The best a guy can do is buy a box of chocolates
and hope he'll be considered somewhere between the cherry truffle and the strawberry nougat...
A Couple Make Some Changes In Their Lives:
We had made some changes in our lives. My husband had lost 50 pounds by low carbing, and after eight years of being a housewife,
I had taken a job in a restaurant. When I returned home after my first day at work, I gave my husband a big hug.
He seemed to cling to me longer than usual. "Did you really miss me that much today, dear?" I asked. "No," came
the reply. "But you smell so much like pancakes that I hate to let you go."
A Woman Checks in on her Husband's Daily Weigh-In:
I noticed my husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his ample stomach.
Thinking he was trying to weigh less with this maneuver, I quipped, "I don't think that is going to help much."
"Sure it does," he said. "How else can I can see the numbers?"
Caramel Nougat Bars!
makes remarkably good, smooth, creamy Belgium Chocolate
candies... as we all know! Now, they have added smooth, Rich Candy Bars
to their line of great sugar-free, low carb sweets!
These bars are like
Milky Way, Snickers and the like... lot's of caramel and choclate in a
creamy mix of sweetness! Oh yeah! Now we have a candy bar that tastes
like we are cheating... when we aren't!"
Click here to order.
"Where Low Carb and Low Prices Meet!"